All I Want for Christmas Is a Comeback

I can't take that my last blog post was over two and a half years ago. Or that the last two posts are just old financial articles I wrote, squatting on my fun and witty blog because they had no where to go when their home was removed from the interwebs.

Alas, my dreams of becoming a famous and wealthy blogger will wait for no one, including me. So what I'm saying is that the blog must come back. It probably won't be pretty at first (kind of like this little blogger space I've created.) I just can't figure out how to get a picture to go all the way across the top or how to insert a recipe so that it can be indexed on Pinterest - what's it called, the java hash script thingy? Don't tell anyone I work in digital marketing.

I spent the last two years trying to decide what my comeback post would be about. It's just a lot of pressure! It has to be good enough that people (you) want to come back. It can't rip off of the other bloggers I've grown to love and envy, it should include a fabulous recipe, and some high-qual photography.

But I'm just a little bit too lazy to re-launch with that much pizzazz. 

I'm narrowing down that list to focus on the most important list of the year. My Christmukkah list. Okay, I never really make a list for myself. I just drop lots of hints, because I'm too focused on my giant Excel spreadsheet tracking what I'm getting for everyone else, including item, store, date ordered, shipping information and price. Every year I end up spending around the same thing, even though I never set a budget upfront. Isn't that weird?

You're welcome in advance for all but sticking the bow on my own gifts this year. 

Dear Santa or anyone who cares,
I want:

• This Fresh Cream flavored (scented?) perfume. Because it would be awesome to smell like whipped cream all the days of my life. And I haven't even smelled it yet.
• A beach cruiser bike - probably in a pastel color with a wicker basket and bell with my name written on it in glitter
• Lifetime supply of these age-defying products because I'm going to be stupid THIRTY next year.
• Kitchen stuff (because who has time to wait for a registry?): Blender, pots, pans, silverware, plates, coffee maker, espresso machine, apple corer, ice cream maker, slotted spoon, kitchen scissors, garlic mincer, round cake pans (tiered and non-tiered), & Magic Bullet
• So I can pretend to know how to curl my hair: Chi Air Expert Classic Tourmaline Ceramic 1-Inch Flat Iron
• Makeup - just all of it
• Tea & Sympathy candles preferably Milk & Cookies but Biscuits & Berries is good too - sold out everywhere, so good luck
• A Christmas Pickle so I can hide it on the tree and then find it and get an extra gift
• Sparkly, diamondy stuff
• Kindle/Amazon gift cards so I can read Outlander for the rest of time. (Jamie = Swoon)
• Yoga stuff
• Iron because I have an empty place on a far-off closet shelf
• Piano, otherwise that decade of lessons just keeps going to waste
• Kate Spade discontinued sprinkles makeup bag
• Taylor Swift album (preferably on Spotify)
• Ugg slippers so my feet can sweat in our non-stop 80 degree San Diego weather 
• Invite to the Star Wars premiere

And while we're asking....

• A bunch of vacation
• A life in Europe
• Hovercraft
• Role on a successful sitcom
• Unlimited free miles and fancy hotel rooms

Sincerely,
Ellyn

My Failed Detox

I decided to detox after watching the documentary, Fat Sick and Nearly Dead on Netflix last Saturday night (cuz that's what you do when you're 27 apparently). That night I threw out a macaroon and Shaun got rid of his leftover pizza (by eating half of it) and we went grocery shopping for about 10 pounds of fruits and vegetables.

In the movie, it's all about juicing and drinking all of your meals for weeks, but these people were obese and really unhealthy. Since I didn't want to lose weight, just feel healthier, I did the Whole Living Action Plan (I still had the January issue lying around and remembered it). We eliminated alcohol, caffeine, gluten, added sugar, dairy, meat, processed food, and did I forget anything? Oh yes, happiness. Week 1, we're only allowed fruits, veggies, nuts, seeds and oils which seemed like a great idea at the time. Week 2 you add fish, lentils, soy, and beans and week 3 you can add back gluten free grains and eggs.

Day 1 was easy because it was a Sunday. We had a smoothie lunch (berries with water/ no sugar applesauce) and then some delicious homemade broccoli soup for dinner. I might've added a little chicken broth, but I didn't want to throw it out and it was already open. I also made a pretty avocado salad.

Photo from Whole Living by Bryan Gardner

Day 2 - massive headache, smoothie breakfast (berries/water), leftover salad lunch, banana maybe, coconut water, another soup dinner (this time Butternut Squash) with grilled mushrooms/peppers - my skin looked healthier but I was very tired - they said that would happen as toxins leave your body.

Day 3 - What they don't tell you is that toxins leave your body by violently beating their way out of your head. Smoothie breakfast (carrot juice with mangos/pineapple - 700% of your daily value of Vitamin A), apple snack (I might've added peanut butter this day because I just needed something - although even that has added sugar), salad lunch, finally strong enough to do yoga after 3 days of weakness, yet another soup dinner (broccoli again) with mushrooms/peppers on the grill again. Tried to make kale chips, didn't work out. Shaun admitted to drinking a can of Coke which is most definitely not allowed.

Day 4 - Do not feel like working - fruit smoothie in a to-go cup (carrot/mango), raw apple, salad lunch, mixed nuts snack (makes me feel sick possibly because the almonds were flavored and had a bunch of crap ingredients), drank 7 cups of water. Then had a team dinner, so kind of gave up on the all fruits/veggies thing. Ate 3 pieces of sushi, had a mushroom salad, and okay fine, a Bellini. It was nom.

Day 5 - By Thursday I mostly threw in the towel. Smoothie breakfast (berry/water) with apple, then for lunch I splurged and got chicken on my salad. It made me feel amazing. I don't even love chicken, but I really needed protein I guess. Then I had two Girl Scout cookies. hahaha After the gym, we went to our favorite Jewish deli and I had a pickle, mashed potatoes (hello carbs!!) and barley soup. AND another cookie. Best day ever!

I forgot I have to fit into my bridesmaid dress in a few weeks, so I figured I should stop starving. If I normally ate really unhealthy, I could see how the detox would be a good thing to teach me how to eat. But otherwise, it's just sort of torture and makes you miss things you never eat anyway. My problem is that I don't love food enough (I blogged about that already) and I never know what to eat so I just eat a lot of salad. It's really boring!

I started a food diary using My Fitness Pal on Wednesday, which is great for anyone because it shows you if you don't eat enough protein, carbs, etc. based on your height and weight and how much you want to lose (or maintain). It recalculates if you exercise. All in all, I recommend a cleanse if you really need to re-learn how and what to eat and have really bad habits (fast food, lots of red meat, pasta etc). If you're already a health nut, it's not necessary. However, a food diary is good for anyone, because now I can see which nutrients I'm lacking and maybe eat less sweets and processed foods. It makes you double think your choices if you have to enter it into an iPhone app... and you know what? I still haven't had Starbucks all week which is a major win for me.

Have you ever done a fast or detox? What do you think about them?

Why You Should Move to CA...

I'm bringing Old Faithful back to life. This blog got me through four years in New York City, before I finally achieved my only goal in life - to move to California. Now I'm going to use it to document my new CA life and try to get all of my friends and family to move out here too :)

I've been living in San Diego since the end of June, and I'm still trying to figure out what I'm doing here. My new goal in life is to do a headstand in yoga (I joined a studio), win the lottery (I've played twice so far, which is 2x more times than I've played in the past), and honestly, I have no idea what else.

I still work in media, and it's pretty much exactly like my NY job, except instead of a cube with high gray walls and no natural light until after 6pm; I sit under a large vent which blasts cold air on me until after 6pm, and it's more of a large desk versus a cube. After work, I go to yoga to work on that blasted headstand and watch TV. I watch way more TV than I used to for two reasons. One, we didn't have cable last year. And two, I have nothing else to do. Well, except blog and play kickball with work on Thursdays. I'm obviously expanding my horizons if I'm playing a team sport. I'm not really the sporty type.

It's a very strange, unsettling, liberating feeling to move to a place where you know no one and your close friends and family live thousands of miles away. I can't imagine doing this alone, and this has to be good for my relationship, since Shaun and I spend every non-working hour together. Sometimes I even walk home for lunch (he works from home), so there's another hour. On the weekends, we try to do different, touristy things so we don't just watch TV. So far we've gone to the zoo, played tennis, explored new neighborhoods, wine tasted on 2-3 occasions, went on a booze cruise, drove Corvettes, and when in doubt, we go to the beach. Rough life.

Pacific Beach, while having a cocktail at a pool

I left NY because I hated the snow that smothered us last winter, I was sick of of feeling sick on the subway, and something about California captured my attention since I was a kid. It was the perfect opportunity to move, because Shaun was ready for a new job and our lease was almost over, so we just sort of did it. It was really stressful at the time but now it seems like no big deal. Overall, I'm less anxious I think, although I have a very intense fear of someone falling off my 27th floor balcony. I really miss my social circle and always having something to do, especially on the weekends. I hate missing important things, like bridal showers for my best friends who are basically all getting married this year. I even miss the homeless people in NY, who weren't even half as insane and drugged out as these San Diego bums.

But wait, this blog is supposed to convince everyone to move here! On the positive side, you won't find more perfect scenery unless you move to Bora Bora, but I heard it's really expensive there and the food is terrible. We have amazing Mexican food, and it's cheap. We have a lot of fro yo places, with toppings such as frosted animal crackers. It's 70 and sunny every single day. I don't even know why I still get weather alerts. One time it rained (drizzled) and everyone was so confused and couldn't drive an inch. I can be at the beach in less than 10 minutes (I go to Coronado which was voted the #1 beach in CA). Wine is really cheap and overall rent is less expensive than Manhattan. Plus I live here, and I need to be entertained! What more could you ask for, really? Besides maybe more friends and family in the vicinity...

La Jolla